Falling off the bandwagon...

... and struggling to get back on.

To be honest, I haven't been the best at my diet since the week of Labor day. I have lost some more weight, but not entirely too much. Labor week was a busy one for me, with my anniversary and TWO labor day parties to attend too, I was seriously just CHOWING down on anything I could get my hands on.

The problem is now jumping back on the healthy "lose weight" bandwagon. I've lost 15 lbs? Which to me is significant enough to see a change in my body, but I want to see a change in my clothes. My clothes are fitting better, but its still not anything to call home about. 

Once I fell off the bandwagon I'm finding it harder and harder to get back on. And the wedding for my cousin is inching nearer and nearer and I'm not any closer to my -20 lb weight loss goal. I definitely notice the difference in my face, and in my pictures for sorority you can tell that my face has slimmed down. But I'm reaching the point where those first 10lbs slid off so easily and the rest is going to be work.

To be fair though, I put on an old pair of jeans today and they actually fit! It's the small victories from now on I suppose!

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Where I'm at now

Weight Loss & What I'm Doing To Get Healthy

Post 3 of 3:

A little post on how much I've lost & how its going overall.

So far I've lost 13 pounds.
Well, since the last time I got on a scale I've lost 13 pounds. I make a conscious effort to not step on the scale everyday and to just weigh myself once a week, usually on Saturday, and before I've done any of my morning activities. Although in the new apartment I can't actually weigh myself because I don't have a scale. I think I'll just wait to weigh myself again when I go back to my Grandparents house. (in over a week)

Weight Loss Goals~!

Weight Loss & What I'm doing to get healthy

Post 2 of 3

Today I'm gonna chat about my weight loss goals.

And show embarrassing pictures of me staring down at the scale in disappointment.

Goals:

Short term: My only goal is to lose 20lbs before my cousins wedding in the beginning of November. I'm in the wedding party and I'm terrified I'm going to be the chunky one in the group. I mean I probably still will be but at least I'll be 20 lbs lighter. AND, being 20 lbs lighter puts me at 170lbs. Which for me is a great first goal.

Long term: I'd love to get back down to less than 160lbs. Putting me at 150-159lbs. This is the weight I find most ideal for myself and appropriate for myself to maintain. At this weight I can feel most confident in myself and achieving this goal will feel amazing. I am not tall, and I know that this weight is high for people of my stature, but I am built like a workhorse. I didn't get hit by a car and have the ability to walk away by not being built like a workhorse. I have always been heavier and have a stockier build than other women. So putting myself through hell trying to reach an unattainable goal is doing nothing but torturing myself and lowering my self esteem.

Overall, I would LOVE to be able to wear a bikini again.
I want to be able to be confident enough in my body to walk out in a bikini again. I know everyone has a bikini body by just putting a bikini on their body, but feeling confident about that body under the bikini is a big part of looking sexy in said bikini.

If you don't feel confident, you wont look confident. And confidence is sexy.

BIKINI HERE I COME. I WANT TO PUT YOU ON MAH NEW CONFIDENT SEXY BODY.
Also since when was a size 14 considered plus size and why are all the 'plus-sized' swimsuits awful? I wanna look cute, not like my Grandma. (ps. love ya grams! <3)

Stalk me?

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-Jenn

On the topic of Weight Loss...

Weight Loss & What I'm doing to get healthy

Post 1 of 3:

I'm not necessarily sure if these posts are necessary, but I wanted to share how I'm losing weight to inspire others to find ways that work for them too!

Overall, I just count calories. My limit started out at 1230 a day, and once I lost the first 10lbs the myFitnessPal app dropped it to 1200 a day.

Yes, I keep a copy of it stuck to my monitor. Also, ponies on my desk.

Food Schedule: I haven't really changed too much. I'm more or less just /very/ conscious of what I'm putting in my body now. And I keep the same food schedule almost everyday.

Food Schedule:

Breakfast: ~9AM - 9:30 AM

Snack: ~10:30 AM

Lunch: 12 Noon

Snack: ~2 PM

Dinner: ~6 PM - 7 PM

Dinner always fluctuates based on what time I leave work. And sometimes I eat breakfast at home when I have enough time in the morning. Otherwise, this is the Food Schedule I stick too. 

Typical meals for me are pretty routine, and I'm a creature of habit and have no problem eating the same things and only changing them up a little bit before I get sick of them one way and not the other. I love yogurt and chicken, & I made basic changes from things I would usually eat beef for to chicken or turkey. I also bake a lot of foods now vs. frying them. And have amped up the amount of greens I eat.

If you've got any delicious healthy recipes to share you can comment them below or send them to me via social media: Twitter & Bloglovin & Facebook & Instagram & Tumblr

I'll be posting about this all week long so keep on the lookout!

-Jenn

I'm wearing WHAT...?!

I'M WEARING WHAT...?!

Pants. Yes, pants.

To those of you who know me, you are seriously surprised because I only wear pants every once in a blue moon. Well, apparently a blue moon is tonight because I've got not only JEANS but SKINNY JEANS on.

To be honest I never thought I'd fit in these pants again. But, I do! They are still a bit tight, but wearable nevertheless. They are a darker denim and I've paired them with a colorful top. For my hair I've just done a simple hairstyle and paired it with simple makeup. I find going to work all glammed up to be a bit overkill. All I do all day is stare at code and the only people who notice are my co workers, who are already in shock that I've decided to wear pants. Please ignore my sandals: I had a charlie horse in my calf last night that left my leg aching for the majority of the day. (I actually left the house in my slippers!)

OOTD - FOTD - Weight Loss Update!

This morning my wardrobe was seriously lacking because more than half my clothes, accessories, and shoes are packed up. So doing an OOTD was almost impossible, but I decided to do it anyway.

It monsooned outside my office on and off all day.

This outfit is pretty simple, just a dress I picked up a few years ago at Target. My fiance actually picked it out, and I wore it on the night we got engaged. The shoes are Pink & Pepper black madja gladiator sandals. I carried a blue teal Coach leather handbag I've had for a couple years. Its large and can hold all the things I need for school and work! (minus my laptop) I had my hair natural in just a headband. It was another wet day outside today, so I kept everything simple.

Who else despises the word 'diet'?

Because I definitely do.

The one thing that I have absolutely abhorred about myself since my graduation from high school is my weight gain. It didn't bother me so much when it was only that 'freshman 15' but that freshman 15 has turned into a freshman 50.

Yes, in my 6 years since I graduated high school, I have gained 50 pounds.

My weight has fluctuated a lot since then, honestly, but this is the highest I've ever been and I really needed to take charge of what I was eating and my health in general. So this past week I've been doing a fairly decent job of keeping track of the food I've been eating and making a conscious effort to eat healthy. The only thing I do not do, is exercise. Its not that I don't enjoy doing anything physical, its just that I get bored. I do not find running on a treadmill or lifting weights systematically very stimulating mentally. Starting small is probably the way to go. But where to start...?

The first thing I did was download the myFitnessPal app. I heard about it while browsing youtube and looking for ways to kickstart this "lifestyle change." The app suggests that I eat 1230 calories a day. Which is only 30 calories over what I should be eating minimum a day. I knew that was going to be hard but ugh. Misery! After a few days of realizing how many calories I was probably eating I know how I got to be as heavy as I am now.

I started this journey on Monday, and the first week has been a course of trials and tribulations. (and portion control, and impulse control, and frustration) But I'm getting the hang of it.

I think I'll realize that this journey is being successful when I hit that first 20 lbs.

-Jenn